Note from Lana | Lifestyle Queen Bee: I have anxiety. I’ve had it for as long as I can remember. A lot of people misinterpret worry for anxiety. Anxiety can really impact your life by always preventing you from doing the things you enjoy or even need to do. People with anxiety often feel embarrassed to let people know & suffer in silence. Personally, I have no problems sharing my struggles with anxiety with people (I also have OCD) so this post, shared with us by one of my regular guests Christine H, is for those who are struggling with anxiety & providing you with ways to cope with it. Continue reading “Do You Struggle With Anxiety?”
Note from Lana | Lifestyle Queen Bee: At one point in our life, we fall into a rut. We never mean to get there; it kinda just happens. While having a routine can help keep you organized and structured, it also is one of the first things that traps you in the same old thing, day in and day out. A lot of times, once we’ve found ourselves in a rut, we’re not quite sure how to get out. Today’s post, by guest blogger Kelly Walsh from essaychip, is sharing with us that one thing we need to help us make a change in our lives.
Okay. I get it. Nothing ever seems right. I mean, you keep on doing your best. You do your best at the office. You do your best getting along with people you’re not very close with. You do your best to be a good son or daughter. The list goes on.
To be really honest, you actually have no idea why everything in your life seems wrong. As far as you know, you’ve doing what you think is right. Yet, nothing good seems to come out of it.
These sort of things keeps on going on and on in your head, even when you know the answer to your musings. You know that you’re not really the reason these things are happening. I mean, you’re not the only one living on this vast planet. Even if you try to do everything right, things can still go wrong because other creatures affect your life too.
But even if you keep that thought in your head all the time, it will do nothing to cheer you up. It doesn’t change the fact that you’re beating yourself off trying to make things right, but things just never go right.
You want to change the way you live. You want to wake up someday and just laugh at this matter, but you just can’t.
You’ve already read all the life-improvement books you can possibly read. They’re not working. It’s either that or you’re just not following their advice right.
Look, it’s not you. The real reason why your life is like this is because you have no outlet. The truth is you’re not alone. We all go through these sorts of things. You’re not the only one who thinks that nothing in his life is going right. Everyone does it. The only difference is other people know how to go with it. The answer all lies in an outlet. You need something that can help you let all your frustrations out.
Here’s another truth you probably hear every time, but just never took the time to think about: life is unfair. That’s that. You have to deal with that fact. You should know how to move on when things don’t go exactly as you planned.
What does an outlet have anything to do with my life?
Well, that’s a pretty good question.
I mean, if you want to change your life, then there’s your answer. You need to change, but it’s not that simple.
You might be thinking of that big change, but unless you completely throw your grudges and negative experiences in the trash bin, it’ll keep on haunting you, and then you’ll never be able to reach the finish line of the “change” race.
Do you know what you really need?
No, you don’t need another one of those best-selling life-improvement books. What you need is a blog. It’s just perfect. How come? Well, read on to find out.
- There’s no right or wrong way of doing it
You don’t have to worry about making mistakes. You don’t have to worry about anything else going wrong.
Isn’t that what brought you in this state in the first place? The fear of losing? The fear of failure? The fear of criticism?
It’s good to know that when everything in your life fails, there is someplace you can go where you don’t have to ever worry about messing up, and that’s online, on your blog.
You can write about your life in any way you want. You can say anything you want. Once you let it all out changing your life will come easy.
- You’ll be connected with the right kind of people
We don’t get to choose the people we are surrounded with. Sometimes we do, but most of the time it’s the opposite.
I mean, we have the freedom to choose the kind of friends we have, but having a specific group of friends doesn’t mean that other people can’t affect us. Their decision matters in our lives.
We live on one planet. Whatever they do we’ll all be affected at some point. When things go bad, we can feel like we have no one to turn to, especially if we’re surrounded by people who don’t share the same views, but through a blog, you’ll be able to meet and befriend people who share the same values as you.
Thanks for such an insightful post, Kelly!
If you’re interested in submitting a guest post to the blog, head over to the Collabs page for more info!
Kelly E. Walsh lives in South Carolina. She is a graduate of BS in Computer Science but preferred pursuing her writing career instead. Mostly because she loves telling stories and sharing her knowledge through writing.
She is currently writing for essaychip.com on a regular basis and do ghost writing for some companies as well.
Note from Lana |Lifestyle Queen Bee: Do you guys remember my blogger feature on Dawn Craven from My Life In A Blog? (If you missed the interview, check it out here). She’s back today with a spectacular guest post on 50 ways to live a healthier & happier existence. With the warmer weather ahead, it’s time to shake off those winter cobwebs & get ready to enjoy life (& outside!) again.
Sometimes all we need is a tiny little Continue reading “50 Life Changes for Happy & Healthier Living”
Note from Lifestyle Queen Bee: Happy Thursday! It’s been a busy week for me with finishing off some subcontract Virtual Assistant work and sending out proposals & setting up Discovery calls with some potential clients that I am thanking my lucky stars for these amazing guests posts! Today, my guest is Aurora M and she’s here to debunk some Continue reading “4 Common Beauty Myths Busted”
Note from Lifestyle Queen Bee: As a blogger who treats my blog very much like a business, self-care is a major priority to me and something I try to encourage others to practice regularly. While I am a lover of pretty, sparkly things and tend to write & heavily feature these things on my blog & social media accounts, it’s also important to use my blog as a platform to discuss important issues like depression. Today, my guest is Lori Smith from the blog, Write Word Studios, who’s talking all about depression in business and ways to not only identify that this may be happening to you but how you can help address the issue.
Let me start off by saying, I’m going to get painfully real here, but it needs to be put out there. This article is about the not-so-pretty side of business few talk about, at least, not in depth.
I belong to several Facebook business/blogging groups. All are full of super helpful and supportive people. There’s always someone with an answer to all your questions, and plenty of ears to listen when you need to vent. You’re probably asking yourself, what does this have to do with the ugly side of business? Well, in these groups I’ve noticed a particular post that is a recurring theme with online business owners. It goes a little something like this:
“Guys, today has been the worst day ever. Nothing has gone right. I recorded a video, only to find out the lens cap was still on my camera, and I now have to record it all over again. I feel like a complete idiot. I wrote what I feel is the most awesome post, but it’s so personal that I haven’t been able to click publish. It’s hard to put yourself out there, and I have all this self-doubt about my writing. I’ve been at this for a year now, and I’m just not where I think I should be. I seriously have less than 1k page views monthly. I can’t help but compare myself to others with 10k views or more. I’m failing. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. I’m crying more than I’m working. Maybe I’m not cut out for this entrepreneur thing. Every day I sit down at my computer I’m becoming more confused, and unmotivated. All I want to do is lay in bed with the covers over my head. My family doesn’t get the whole blogging thing. They just keep telling me I need to get a real job. I don’t know what to do. At this point, I’m ready to give up because I just can’t do this anymore. I’m so DEPRESSED.”
Note: This is not an actual post
Sound familiar? Can you relate? This, my friends, is the brutal reality of running an online business. Feelings like these don’t just happen once. They happen often.
Being self-employed is hard. When your doing it all on your own, and have bouts of depression, it’s even harder. It’s like an uphill battle on a slippery slope.
Stress is a known trigger for anxiety and depression. If you already suffered from depression before starting your entrepreneurial journey, the added stress can have a profound affect on you and your business. There’re times you might find yourself walking away from your desk more days than you spend at it working. What’s worse, is the toll it can take on you.
This Is Where It Gets Real
I can personally tell you the toll it takes. I suffered from depression before starting my business. Dysthymia to be exact. I’ve been living with it for almost 20 years. It’s not pretty. Matter of fact, it’s downright ugly because it robs you of your spirit. You have days of complete emptiness and feel like nothing but a hollow shell.
The stress of running a business has left me feeling drained at times. Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t how my life is every day. It’s just that there are times when depression hits me out of nowhere. But I’m here to tell you there are things you can do to help it and still be productive.
The Effects Of Depression On Your Business
Why am I disclosing all this? For one, I’m honest to a fault, but my main goal is to open up the discussion about this topic. Get people talking.
It needs to be put out there so entrepreneurs can recognize the signs. They need to know how it can affect their business, and learn ways to manage it. Even if you never suffered from depression before starting a business, you might find yourself suffering from it now. If you are, it may be getting in the way of operating your business.
Depression can affect you in many ways. It can make it difficult to manage the daily activities of running your business:
- Decreased productivity
- Inability to work
- Lack of focus
- Bad decisions or indecisiveness
Can you relate to any of these difficulties? Have you felt this way in your business before? You’re not alone.
Writer’s block can also be a symptom of depression. If you can’t write, then you can’t move things forward with your business. Any momentum or excitement you had could come to a stand still. A lot of times I think we all pass things off as “I’m just tired”, and you may be. However, being tired, feeling like your brain is in a fog, lack of motivation, isolating yourself, are all signs of depression. The proverbial response of “I’m fine” when you’re not, is denial.
If your not recognizing the symptoms, your business will suffer. Plans and goals could get stalled or worse never followed through with at all. Building a successful, thriving business is hard enough. When you’re suffering from depression, it may seem impossible. It’s only impossible if you don’t acknowledge that there’s a problem and take steps to manage it.
What You Can Do About Depression
First, when you have any feelings that are not in line with your normal personality, be honest with yourself; don’t dismiss these feelings. Accept that you may be suffering from depression. This does not, I repeat, this does not make you weak; it makes you human.
We tend to think that if we aren’t strong, confident, and functioning at 110% every day, we are failing. This is not true. Everyone has off days, no matter who they are. The key to those who are successful and those who aren’t, are the ones who accept their faults. They’re the ones who find ways to overcome their problems by doing something about them.
Depression is most often treated with anti-depressant medication. For some, medication alone may not be enough. If you find that you need additional ways to help manage your symptoms, there are alternative methods you can try.
Big Disclaimer Here: I am NOT a medical professional. If you suspect you may have depression, seek help from a physician. Any suggestions below are alternative things that I have tried and have helped me. Keep in mind, what works for one person may not work for someone else. It bears repeating, DO NOT self-treat. If you believe you’re experiencing symptoms of depression, consult a medical professional.
Alternative Ways To Manage Depression
- Exercise – Exercise can reduce stress and anxiety. It releases endorphins and serotonin which aid in boosting mood. Try yoga or running for an endorphin high
- Get Enough Sleep – Not getting enough sleep can cause exhaustion which you guessed it, can lead to depression. Getting a good night’s rest is essential to your overall well-being. Eight hours of sleep a night is ideal, but find what works best for you. Try for at least 7 hours
- Stay Involved – Isolating yourself is a common response to depression, but can only make you feel more depressed. Make it a point to connect with others. Just having lunch with a friend can help your mood
- Set a Routine – When you’re depressed, one day can melt into another. Setting a routine will help with stress and make you feel more productive. Get up at a set time each morning, and go to bed at a regular time each night
- Writing About How You Feel – Expressing your feelings through words can help you work through any issues. If you’re not comfortable talking to someone about your feelings, keep a journal.
- Music – Music therapy is now used to help ease the symptoms of depression. We all know that music can affect
our mood. Listening to your favorite music can help you relax and let go of feelings.
- Meditation – Meditation helps reduce stress by focusing on staying in the moment. When you become overwhelmed, you get stressed. This stress, in turn, can trigger depression. Negative emotions can take over. The practice of meditation can train your mind to push out these toxic thoughts.
These are all things you can try to aid in alleviating your symptoms of depression. They can be helpful in balancing your mood, and if you can balance your mood, you can manage your depression.
But what about achieving success when you suffer from depression? Is it possible? This answer actually lies within you. I believe there’s one thing that will not only help with your depression but is the key to success in your business, and in your life. That’s your mindset.
Why Mindset Is The Key To Success
I think we can all agree that your thoughts can have a profound affect on how well you manage life. When you have negative thoughts swimming around in your head on a consistent basis, you internalize these thoughts. If you think you’re not worthy or not good enough, then these feelings can become part of your self-worth.
Toxic thoughts can be detrimental to your business as well. Depression facilitates negative feelings. When you’re depressed, everything seems worthless. These feelings can leave you paralyzed unable to take action. So you can see how important mindset is in being successful as an entrepreneur.
To succeed in business, you need 3 things:
- You need to be passionate about your business – Having passion will see you through the rough times
- You need to develop a strategy – Throwing random ideas against a wall to see if they stick will get you nowhere fast. You need a good solid strategy that will get results
- You have to execute – If all you do is make plans and never take any actionable steps to implement them, then success will only be a dream
According to psychological studies, repetitive positive thoughts can re-wire your brain and strengthens areas of the brain that stimulate positive feelings. When you feel good, everything runs much more smoothly. When you feel bad, life seems to stop. Your mindset – how you think and feel about your business – will determine your success. Positive thoughts are necessary to maintain the passion for your business. You need a positive mindset to develop result driven strategies, and take the steps to execute those strategies.
What You Can Do To Change Your Mindset
- Start Your Day Off Right – When you first get up in the morning, put any negative thoughts in check. Instead of, it’s going to be a bad day because it’s raining, think about the good things the day can bring. Don’t check email first thing after getting out of bed as this can send you down a rabbit hole. Start off your day thinking only positive thoughts
- Control Your Engagement in Social Media – Social media may be essential for marketing your business, but that doesn’t mean you can’t control how much you’re putting in your head. The price of being connected too much can have a negative impact on you. Everyone seems so perfect on social media. We end up comparing ourselves to others. Remember not everything is always as it seems. Be thankful for all you have. There’s also those feelings with media of FOMO (fear of missing out). Stop focusing on everyone and everything else. Set a schedule for your social media engagement and stick to it
- Practice Gratitude – Write out a list of things you’re grateful for on a consistent basis. Write down your achievements as a reminder of things you have accomplished. If you have any favorite quotes, put them where you can see them every day. Focus on all the positive things in your life
- Recharge Your Energy By Breaking Up Your Day – Your focus can drift when working for extended periods of time. Your mind can become exhausted. Yes, your mind can get tired too. Not to mention what sitting for long periods of time can do to your physical health. Take frequent breaks. Take a walk outside. The sunshine can help lift your spirits and energize you. Try the Pomodoro Technique to increased productivity and keep your mind fresh
- Review Your Goals – When you’re going in a million different directions every day, you can become overwhelmed. This can lead to negativity. Looking back over your goals can help you stay focused. You can see everything you’ve accomplished which reinforces positive feelings.
Depression is not the easiest subject to talk about. The stigma attached to it is harsh and nothing more than judgmental ignorance. Those who have never experienced depression, tend to have a negative perception of it. For many, though, depression is their reality. It can’t just be shaken off. They become experts at hiding it. Some deny they even have a problem. This is not the way to handle it. Try whatever it takes, whether it be medication or the alternative methods above. Find what works for you.
You can function in a productive way if you acknowledge your depression and do something about it. Life doesn’t have to be miserable. You owe it to yourself, your family, and your business to TRY.
Thanks so much for contributing such an important & informative post to my blog, Lori! Depression is something that is very real and that many suffer with in silence. Posts like this not only benefit those who are going through these difficult times by providing some coping mechanisms but also help those who may not recognize the signs in themselves.
You can read more from Lori on her blog, Write Word Studios or by following her on social media:
Would you love to contribute to my blog? You can submit a guest post or be a feature blogger!
Head over to the Collab page & let’s get started!
A Message from Lana | Lifestyle Queen Bee:
Today, I get to take a break from blogging & let someone else take over and share some advice with you. Earlier this month, I featured my interview with fellow blogger, Bronwin Goodbar from _allkindsofme_ (if you missed it, check it out here). Today she’s talking all about those unwanted mentalities that stand in between us and achieving your New Year’s resolutions.
As we limp into the Christmas break and look down the barrel of 2017, now is usually the time when Continue reading “Guest Post: 3 Mentalities That Hold You Back From Achieving Your New Year’s Resolutions”
Winter is coming. If you’re a Canadian reader, you’re probably already living winter conditions although it still is technically Fall (FYI – Winter is officially here on December 21). Maybe the cold weather has set in but you haven’t experienced any snow yet but you might be experiencing the telltale signs of dry hair and skin. Instead of going through the days dried out and looking flaky like a pie crust, it’s about time to swap out the ways (and products) of warmer weather and start transitioning for the long, cold winter ahead. Today, I’m sharing my ultimate guide to winter essentials to help get you started before you officially hibernate for the winter. Continue reading “The Ultimate Guide of Winter Essentials”